i've been duped

i thought all these people were reading my blog and shit, and it turns out that bots have seeped into the blog world and that's what's going on. hahaha. guess i should turn on that captcha bullshit or whatev.

my new crush

i saw beach house last night and let me say, 12 dollars well spent. it was packed and there was little to no a/c and beach house fans are all fucking tall and stood in front of me, but it was still a great show. and now i have an incredibly huge crush on victoria legrand.

















bitch knows how to rock a blazer.

oh, take me back!

what's the deal with everybody? spring fever? two people i know have recently announced their engagements, one of which is my dear friend liz. don't get me wrong, i'm happy for the happy couples but also feel odd about it all. and i'm not jealous, if that's what you're thinking. it's just that i feel confronted by my age, i guess, and by the fact that even if i wanted to get married, who would i marry? mom, if you're reading this, i know who you are thinking of.

um, anyway, what do i really care about societal pressures? i have a low paying job with little to no desire to change my current situation so boo-yah, fuck the naysayers or whatev.

although let's say i get married: django's "out of nowhere" will play for my first dance. guess i better learn how to dance to that style of music, actually. eh, i have probably fifteen years to worry about that.

me?

a friend told me that the following cartoon is me, looks and otherwise:

i wish it was the 60's i wish i could be happy i wish, i wish, i wish that something would happen

listening to the bends in san antonio is weird and i feel 14 again on my way to my shrink's office.

fish lady

this is out of order. i should have told you about bob before drunkenly posting my previous entry.

because i seem to have contracted florence nightingale syndrome, i've been caring for a sickly betta fish that i named bob. my boss bought the fish for her kids, wanting to expose them to pets and responsibility, but her kids grew bored with him and he eventually sat in his tiny bowl, surrounded by his own excrement and food, neglected and depressed. (i just re-read that and laughed at how exaggerated i can be.)

the point is, he wasn't cared for. so she brought him to the office and i took one look at him and decided i was going to nurse him back to health. i bought him a new tank, a water filter, some fake plants, gravel, a heater, and now some medicine to correct what seems to be "fin rot," brought on by the dirty water conditions he lived in before he became my project.

i didn't realize that i could care so much about a fish so quickly. actually, i didn't think they really had personalities, but i was so wrong. every time i walk by bob's tank, he flips around wildly and looks at me. when i crouch down to affectionately touch the glass with my finger, he swims right up against it. he's cute, and i love him. here's a picture of him:

betta bob and my first blog using capital letters, WOAH

I really love my fish bob. Everyday I go to work I check to see if he's still alive and let out a sigh of relief when I see he is. One day I know I'll show up and he will be floating (or sinking?) and I'll have a shitty day. Betta bob.

shitty

shitty
shitt
shit
shi
sh
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music and booze and i'm blogging drunk, a strange first, sound the alarms

when you're drunk, like i am right now, you think you'll always want to feel this way, like youll always want
to listen to "why" by carly simon. i feel strangely content. i wish i were drinking red wine with my uncle
juan, actually. i'd be pleased and he'd probably bust out the bongos or something. he reminds
me of that counting crows song "mr. jones." is this about anything?

i no know html but i learn

slowdive - morningrise

the expansive sound of this song reminds me of being in a basement with blue light filtering in around 5:30 pm in the 90s. it has to be in the 90s. i've said this before.

anyway, 1:51 is the most beautiful part, if you want to call it that. haunting? i don't know. god, i'd suck writing for a music review magazine.

it really does bite

reality bites is showing tonight at discovery green. i got invited to go with nichole but i have to unpack and stuff. also, i feel weird about seeing that movie now. i'm so emo.

cool

the fifth dimension - portrait (1970)



this is a really cool album cover. it reminds me of my old room on my house on surrey, which was sponge painted pink, purple and another color i can't recall. light blue?

march playlist

al bowlly - guilty
lara and the trailers - sugar town
pavement - spit on a stranger
burt bacharach - 24 hours from tulsa
garbage - vow
the 5th dimension - this is your life
the zombies - what more can i do
angelo badalamenti - twin peaks theme
beach house - 10 mile stereo
girls - laura
beck - lonesome tears
thom yorke - black swan
white town - your woman
yann tiersen - sur le fil
patrinell staten - little love affair
ginuwine - differences
electric light orchestra - wishing

onward

this picture i have in my wallet, it really hurts to look at it, but i don't know what to do with it, because i don't want to get rid of it. i feel that someday i'll be able to look at it again, on those little eyes and innocent smile.

oh yeah, i'm moving today.